Monday, April 1, 2013

Self-sealing, wide mouth Mason

I use this Mason jar to practice urine therapy. This is not an April fools' joke.

The lighting is not ideal, but if you look closely, you can read this on the side:





The (o)Uro-boros, the most famous Alchemical symbol

"Urine therapy is Alchemy; Alchemy is urine therapy."

- Andrew Norton Webber* of

When you practice urine therapy, you become a self-sealing creature - the snake eating its own tail.  The Holy Grail is whatever vessel you use to drink the Water of Life.

Urine therapy is the fastest way to decalcify the pineal gland.  If you aren't open to trying it, I recommend you start by drinking pure steam-distilled water.  I agree with Andrew Norton Webber in that I think it is the distilled water aspect of urine that is responsible for many of the medical/spiritual benefits of urine therapy.  Please click here to read Alexander Graham Bell's perspective on distilled water.  It's worth reading.

I suspect that many Freemasons are knowledgeable of urine therapy or practice urine therapy.  The Hermetic Philosophers, (including the Hermetic Order of the "Golden Dawn") Illuminati, Satanists, Alchemists, whatever you want to call them - practice it as well.  This may sound strange, but I actually think they are all one organization, one secret society, and they hoard their golden secret to themselves.

They know that urine therapy works wonders on many diseases and that it activates one's psychic abilities, but they don't seem to be eager to tell the rest of us that piece of news.

So if you're a Free-Mason, you're probably not "free" to divulge this secret - that is, you're not a wide-mouth Mason.  And on the subjet of urine therapy, your lips may be (Hermetically) sealed.

But since I haven't made any vows of secrecy or pledged my allegiance to a secret society, I intend to break the news of urine therapy to the public however I can!

Apparently my grandfather was a Rosicrucian, but I'm not part of the club so I can spread this secret freely!

Freemasonry isn't free!
(No, there's a hefty fuckin' fee)

CTRL+click below to listen in a new tab!
"Freedom Isn't Free" - Team America, from Team America: World Police (2004)

Freedom isn't free
It costs folks like you and me
And if we don't all chip in
We'll never pay that bill

(Full lyrics available here.)

...if we don't all "chip in"
We'll never pay that bill

Freedom isn't free 
No, there's a hefty fuckin' fee  
And if you don't throw in your BUCK 'o five  
Who will?
(Bucky Bailey, as seen in South Park S16E05: "Butterballs")

 Freedom costs a buck 'o five...

Note:  $1.05 - a buck 'o five - was the value of the component parts of a scrapped human body in 2004 when Stone and Parker released the song in Team America: World Police.  (Source: Rockefeller Foundation, - just kidding)  But years ago, back when the Kids in the Hall shot the sketch "Gavin: Leaking," people were worth 87 cents each, apparently.  That's 87 Canadian cents.

CTRL+click below to watch clip in a new tab!
 "Gavin: Leaking" - The Kids in the Hall

"Yeah, but what if a guy leaked on a school bus full of children who were only worth 87 cents each?"


"I have read that if you were to melt people down and sell their component parts, they'd only be worth 87 cents.  That's gotta be a pretty weird store, though." 


Both Ball and Kerr are owned by the Jarden Corporation.

Jarden Corporation - "Success is in our DNA"

Click here to see a DNA animation of some of the companies owned by Jarden.

One of them is Volkl.


*On Thanksgiving 2012 I listened to a recording of Andrew Norton Webber, in which he said that drinking the distilled waters (especially urine) was the secret of Alchemy.  Most people would hear something like that and ignore it - it would go in one ear and out the other.  But I felt a sense of burden when I heard that claim, because I knew I would have to test it for myself.

That kicked off my investigation into Alchemy.

Fortunately, I told this to my chemistry teacher soon after hearing this claim, and he insisted on driving over to my place immediately and delivering two books on the subject of Alchemy for me to borrow and read:

Alchemy: The Medieval Alchemists and their Royal Art by "Johannes Fabricius"
ISBN 0 261 66545 6


Prelude to Chemistry: An Outline of Alchemy, Its Literature and Relationships by "John Read"
ISBN 1-5649-015-1

I recommend you get your hands on a copy of each of these books before the Internet kill switch and Internet refugee camps as seen in South Park S12E06: "Over Logging".

I will make an effort to scan the many images relevant to the distilled waters and upload them soon.

But in short, Andrew Norton Webber was right.  Practically every page in these Alchemy books has some illustration of or reference to one of the distilled waters: distilled water, precipitation (especially dew), urine, raw milk, and blood.  You can't miss it.


1 comment:

HgH8r said...

Hey Calm Canary, it is good to have you back! I missed reading your blog.